This is a play I've been writing for an Independent Study Theater Arts class. Input would be wonderful! Keep in mind that this is the comedy, not the tragedy. ^_^ Enjoy!
Romeo and Juliet [The Comedy]
Act 1 - Scene 1~
[ Back alley of a main Diner in Villach. There is a bench and a tree. Enter Sammy and Gus wearing school colors. (Blue and White) ]
Sammy
Act 1 - Scene 1~
[ Back alley of a main Diner in Villach. There is a bench and a tree. Enter Sammy and Gus wearing school colors. (Blue and White) ]
Sammy
Gus, I swear, I can’t take it anymore!
Gus
C’mon Sammy, he’s not worth your time.
Sammy
No way, I could flatten him!
Gus
Not unless you want to get suspended.
Sammy
Doesn’t matter.
Gus
Man, I don’t know.
Sammy
Uugghhh!! He makes me so angry!
Gus
I wouldn’t get any ideas if I were you. You can be a real pansy sometimes.
Sammy
I’m not a pansy! That dog! I’ll pound him into the wall!
[ Enter Abe and Biff SR, wearing school colors (red and yellow) ]
Gus
Careful Bro, here he comes.
Sammy
I’ll show him, don’t you worry, I’m a man!
Gus
I sure hope you are!
Sammy
‘kay, you start somethin’ and I’ll back you up.
Gus
(looking over his shoulder) You better not run you pansy. (to Biff) Hey, shove off ya scum!
Sammy
Yeah, get off our turf!
Biff
(too Sammy) You say somethin’ to me kid?
Gus
Yeah, you wanna make somethin’ of it?
Abe
[to Biff] Mariner trash, let’s take ‘em.
[ Gus and Biff continue to ‘speak’ silently and become more angry ]
Sammy
Hey! You wanna say that to my face?!
[Enter Benny SL]
Abe
You’d better watch yourself punk, someone might get hurt.
[Abe swings at sammy and hits his stomach]
Gus
[to Biff] Don’t think you can talk to me like that and get away with it!
Biff
I’ll talk to you however I want!
[Gus swings at Biff, but the hit is blocked and he puts Gus in a headlock. All four of them keep fighting as Benny runs toward them]
Benny
Guys! What do you think you’re doing?!
[He makes his way into the brawl]
Cut it out!
[Benny gets socked in the face and falls away from the fight]
Cool it guys! … C’mon stop it!
[Sammy gets Abe pinned on the floor and Gus comes to help him but is pulled away by Biff who punches sammy. benny again gets thrown from the group]
[Enter Tyler SR]
Tyler
What?! You're fighting with these idiots, nerd! I’ll kill you mariner!!
[he puts up his fists and goes for Benny’s head but he dodges each of them]
Benny
[dodging the swings of Tyler’s assault] No, I was trying to stop them!
Tyler
C’mon and fight you coward!! [they fight]
[enter two policemen, two coaches, a few other students, and the Mayor]
Policeman #1
C’mon, Break it up! Break it up!
Policeman #2
You heard him! Come on boys!
[students murmur and talk to each other occasionally gasping. The coaches help break up the fight. They have to hold Benny and Tyler back to keep them from going at each other again.]
[Aside] Cavalier Coach
Tyler, what were you thinking! that’s your second offense this term. As the team captain I can’t allow you to get away with this.
Tyler
But coach, they’re mariners!
C.Coach
I’m well aware of that Tyler. but as much as I agree with your anger, [at this he sends a death glare to the mariner coach] I cannot ignore this type of behavior.
Tyler
You wouldn’t...?
C.Coach
No, you’re too valuable of a player. [Tyler relaxes a bit] But I will have you clean every inch of the bleachers to learn your lesson.
[Enter Robert SL. Exit police with fighters and Coaches (Benny stays) Other students disperse.]
Scene 2~
Benny
[to a forlorn Robert] Good Morning Robert. [He doesn’t respond] Uh...Robert, are you okay man?Robert
[Acknowledging Benny for the first time] Huh? Oh, hi Benny.
Benny
Wow, what’s eatin’ you?
Robert
[Sits on bench and leans over] Ugghh, Rachael just broke up with me.
Benny
Woah! [Rubbing around his ear] Tyler must have socked me good. I thought I just heard you say Rachael broke up with you.
Robert
[looks at Benny. Beat] I did.
Benny
[Beat] But you two have been together, like, forever.
Robert
Yeah, I don’t know what happened. [Enter Janitor SR and hangs up Dance Poster] One day things were just fine, then today she said that she didn’t think it would work out.
Benny
Dude, forget her. There’s plenty of other girls out there, way hotter than Rachael! [Gestures to poster] Look, here’s your chance.
Robert
No! No one could ever replace Rachael! [Puts head in hands]
Benny
Wow Robert, that’s sad. [lightly punching Robert’s shoulder] C’mon man, snap out of it! [Robert looks up at him] Look at you, you’re the team captain, you have a cool car, and you’re single! What girl wouldn’t date you?!
Robert
[without looking up] Rachel.
Benny
Look man, let’s just go to this dance thing and I’ll Show you there’s better girls than Rachael.
Robert
[Taking the challenge] And I’ll go just to show you that no one could be better!
[they exit SR]
Scene 3~
[Lights up on Juliet room DSR. Julie and Nellie sit on bed. Nellie is looking at a year book. Julie is playing with her hair]
Nellie
Ooo! He’s Cute!! [pointing to a guy in the yearbook and showing Julie]
Julie
Scott? He’s like a total nerd. [Taking the year book] And this is from what, like third grade?
Nellie
[Taking it back] No, it’s from last year!
Julie
Honestly Nellie, even if I did like one of the guys at school, it’s not like I’d ever get the chance to talk to him.
Nellie
[Still looking at the book] Why not?
Julie
Tyler’s two steps ahead of me all the time! He never lets me have a second to myself. Unless of course, it’s to talk to Parker [she says his name with disdain]
Nellie
I don’t know, Parker’s kind of cute.
Julie
What are you kidding me?! All he can ever think about is himself!
Nellie
You know he is the student body president.
Julie
Ha, that’s only impressive if you were rightfully voted in.
Nellie
What do you mean?
Julie
He payed students to vote for him.
Nellie
Oh.
Julie’s Mom (off stage)
Honey, dinner will be ready in five minutes!
Julie
Okay Mom!
Mom
Oh, and Jenelle can’t stay for dinner!
Julie
It’s Nellie Mom! [to Nellie] Sorry, we’re supposedly having company over.
Nellie
That’s fine. [Looking to her left at her invisible friend] C’mon Jeffrey, we’d better get going.
Julie
You still hang out with...Jeffrey?
Nellie
[Gasp!] Don’t insult him! [Consoling Jeffrey] It’s okay, she didn’t really mean it.
Julie
Um, Nellie, we’re in High School.
Nellie
[Slowly walking out of Julie’s room] Well you don’t think I’d leave him at home do you?! Just because we’re growing up and moving on, doesn’t mean that Jeffrey should be allowed to experience life too! [Leaves in a huff]
[Blackout]
J M D T
Scene 4~
[Lights up SRC. Table set, Julie’s mom is bringing in the main dish and her dad is already sitting down.]
Mom
Julie! Don’t be late for dinner! [Dad tries to steal some food from a bowl, mom slaps his hand away]
Julie
[backstage] I’m coming mom! [Enter Julie SR]
Dad
[Standing up] Julie dear, how was your day at school? [He gives her a brief hug and kiss on the cheek. He then steals some food from the bowl while mom isn’t looking]
Mom
[Looking at an analog clock on the kitchen wall] Oh, where’s Tyler? He should be here by now.
Tyler
Wow! Did someone spill a tank of toxic waste? [Drops his backpack on the floor. Holding his nose] What in the world is that smell?
Mom
Tyler, how many times do I have to tell you? Don’t leave your backpack on the floor! [sighs exasperatedly] And that smell would be your dinner. [hands on hips]
Tyler
[Picks up backpack] Aww, gee mom! I was just kidding. [Hangs backpack up on hook on the wall]
Mom
Come sit down Tyler, the food’s getting cold.
Julie
[too dad] Hey dad, I’d like to ask you-
Tyler
Dad, you wouldn’t mind if I hang out with Parker later, would you?[They start getting food and eating]
Dad
Sure Tyler, why don’t you take Julie along with you!
Julie
Dad-
Dad
Just a minute sweetie.
Tyler
Great, Rachael’s gonna be there too.
Mom
[Clearly disgusted] That, Mariner, girl.
Tyler
Mom, she only switched schools because her dad got a new job.
Mom
I’m just not sure about her, if you know what I mean. [pointing at Julie]
Julie
What?! You guys are talking about me like I’m not even here!
Dad
Sorry, dear did you have something to say?
Julie
Uuugghh!! [Slumps back in chair.]
Tyler
[mocking/cockey] Gee Julie, if there’s something you want to say, just say it.
Julie
[collecting herself] The fact of the matter is, [Looking at Tyler] I’m on to you brother, boy am I on to you! [looking back and forth at mom and dad] And I’m not interested! [folds arms and sits back]
Mom
Julie dear, what are you talking about?
Julie
All of you scheming and conniving against me!
Dad
What do you-
Julie
Parker!
Mom
Parker? Dear, what’s wrong with Parker?
Julie
Obviously nothing, according to you!
Tyler
Yeah! He’s the student body president, the mayor’s son, he-
Julie
You keep out of this! I’m very well aware that he’s the student body president, and I get enough from you at school!Tyler
Aww, geez Julie. I just-
Julie
Admit it, you’re just as annoyed by him as I am. You only hang around him because he’s Rachel's next door neighbor! [Beat] And ‘cause mom and dad pay you.
Mom, Dad, and Tyler
Now Julie-
See here-
You take that-
Julie
NO! I really don’t need my own family messing with my love life!
Mom
Julie we just-
Julie
No! I’ve had it!! [exits SR]
[Blackout]
Scene 5~
[Capulet High School. School bell rings. Students mingle and walk to classes. Backdrop of lockers and a few classroom doors. Some students open their lockers and go into the classrooms. Julie enters SL. Crosses to a locker ULC. Enter Tyler and Parker SL. They cross DS on the quarter line. Tyler is eating a banana, and Parker is constantly fixing his hair.
Tyler
‘Kay, here’s your chance. Remember what we talked about. You make her smile, or laugh and we get a bonus. Split 80-20, just like we agreed.
Parker
I thought the deal was 70-30.
Tyler
Look, 80 is bigger than 70.
Parker
Oh, yeah...I like that.
Tyler
Now get going!
[A boy USR acknowledges Julie and starts walking toward her. Tyler notices this and throws his banana peel in front of him so he slips and falls. Some students laugh as he gets up. During this Parker Goes up to julie and and follows her as she crosses DSR. Tyler stays crosses DSL and watches their conversation]
Parker
Mornin’ beautiful. [puts his arm around her shoulder] How ya doin’? [He fixes his hair]
Julie
[pushes his arm off] I’m fine Parker. [doesn't really meet his eyes.] But I’m going to be late for-
Parker
Don’t worry about it, I’ll cover for you.
Julie
But I really-
Parker
You know Jules, There’s a dance this weekend-
Julie
Don’t call me that, it makes me sound like a necklace or something.
Parker
Well I was wondering-
Julie
I’m busy.
Parker
What?
Julie
I have plans with a...friend.
Parker
Wh-what are you talking about? [he can’t believe she actually turned him down]
Julie
Well it’s none of your business. I just have plans, end of story. [she starts to leave]
Parker
Wait, I... [He puts his arm around her waist, pulling her closer and moves some hair behind her ear. She’s too surprised to do anything] I just really wanted to go with, you.
Julie
[she steps out of his arms] Sorry, you’ll just have to find someone else. [she leaves before he can say anything else. Tyler snaps his fingers in the “aww, darn” gesture]
[Blackout]
